These are my thoughts these days.

Two weeks to go until the big day… and when I say big, I mean long.  There is nothing I can do at this point to improve my performance and my head is full of pointless taper wonders – Did I do enough? am I prepared? Mentally? Physically? Philosophy? For now though, it’s time to relax.  Today is the first day in months that I didn’t exercise.  It’s a strange thought but it feels good.  I actually slept about 9 hours last night. So this is what it feels like to be awake?? It’s wonderful! Why would I ever sacrifice this? Another pointless wonder. 

Tamir and I have pointless wonders together like what kind of tattoo to get after the Ironman? Should they match? What colors? Where? How big? Maybe we shouldn’t get one at all.  It stays on for life… I’m a normal person and I never wanted a tattoo before.  It’s scarier than it seems but so cool at the same time.  I have to get one, I worked hard for it and sacrificed a lot. Will it hurt? I hope I don’t regret it.

How will I feel? Did I pack everything? What if I don’t finish? NO! I will finish. Stop thinking about that! What if I throw up or have an upset stomach? NOPE! can’t think of that either. Whats wrong with me…  Everything will be fine, I just want it to be over or maybe I want to be at the start line.  The truth is that it would be good to just be on that flight already.  Really, I should just go and have a good time, this is a hobby after all.  I mean, there is some competition. I’m sure I can do better than most girls in my age group so it won’t exactly be a day in the park.  I can probably geta Kona slot if those Brazillian girls don’t have money to go.  I’m a strong triathlete.    Nah, that won’t happen, be realistic.  People train for Kona their entire lives. This is your first Ironman so just enjoy… but be competitive too.  I guess, somewhere in between.

Tapering is fun, but it also sucks. I have to eat less because I’m not working out as much and now I have more time to eat. Don’t think about that.  You need to be fed so that you can perform for this race. I need a piece of chocolate, just a small one to calm my nerves.  OK, I should be calm now and relax until the race…

What time is it? Oh.. 19:30 and I’m still at work… I have to train two hours tomorrow. That’s a lot… how did I work out for 7 hours when I wasn’t tapering, 2 days ago… Those were crazy times back then. 2 weeks of this? really? I think I’m forgetting something…